Because of You

So my niece is 14 - she tried out for Attache yesterday and I'm so proud of her. She practiced and did everything just like she should have and she felt really good about her audition. That's all we could ask for. I've been helping her get ready and she has major meltdowns about singing in front of anyone. So trying to listen and give her tips was practically impossible. She finally quit being so shy and decided that singing in front of me was OK. So then I can help her sing the right way so it doesn't hurt her throat... and she rocks. She gets it and really rocks. Especially for a kid who has NEVER been in the school choir or had any real voice lessons. She's taken dance for 7 years and she's always been a natural. She's just really good at whatever she takes a notion to be good at. She loves to dance, so she's good at it. Show choir would be right up her alley. But she's an 8th grader and this is the first year he's actually auditioned any girls for 9th grade spots. So while the spots are few I think she has a really good chance to get one. And if not, there's always next year. Life goes on. But can I just tell you that some of these kids and their MOTHERS are simply ridiculous about the whole Attache tryout thing? They've actually fallen out crying in the high school hallway where the list is posted of who made it for the next year. And I mean literally - falling out in the floor, crying. Do you know how much of a fool they must look like? That is ridiculous. And I have the right to judge- I've been there. I've looked at the Attache list and not seen my name. And I didn't pass out. Was I upset, disappointed? Sure. Everyone else was too. But I sure didn't act like it was the end of my existence because I didn't make it as a singer/dancer. And the list of those who didn't make it was much longer than the list of those who did. So I wasn't alone, which made it better. But the drama that surrounds the list is crazy and some of it comes from the mothers. Nuts! So if you're one of those parents - stop. Think. Do NOT embarrass your child with a pathetic meltdown in front of the rest of her friends (who may not stay her friends if you act like an idiot). Do not make your child feel worse because of you. Get over yourself and be proud of your child for trying in the first place. It takes major courage for a child to stand in front of the Fehrs and sing by herself. It takes major courage to walk in a room full of 3-year member seniors and dance with them. And try to control your mouth if your kid doesn't make it. He can't pick them all - someone gets left out. It's his job and he's been doing a pretty damn good job of it for the past 20 years. You may not agree with his choice, but I bet he'll come home with another Grand Championship. Don't have your child not make it next year because of you. People talk. Don't be one of them. Would I have made a good singer/dancer my years? Yes. But I wasn't what he was looking for at the time. So I was on the stage crew and I did a pretty darn good job at it. It taught me a lot and I'm grateful for having been a part of it all. And I wasn't ostracized for not making it. My friends were all still the same. And your kid's will be too. Don't stop supporting her friends who did make it. They deserve congratulations and praise for their efforts, too. So suck it up and move on. Let your child enjoy high school in some other way or try out again next year. But whatever you do, love your child for her effort and courage. Get over your own need to fulfill your shortcomings. Don't have her feel like a failure because of you. My parents loved me no matter what the list said. They never made me feel like I had failed or let them down. They let me be sad for a little while and then they made me move on. And I'm grateful for that. I learned that my talents could be used other places. I learned that my value didn't come from my name on a list. So, thanks Momma. Thanks Daddy. I know I'm who I am because of you.....